How our memories effect us

Tgif Treadmill Treats

How our memories effect us

Yesterday I wrote a blog about addiction and I knew I would get a response from my cousin who I love dearly.
It was about my former best friend and how I pray for her to get well.

Well my cousin definitely had something to say about this one...like I didn't already know that... and yes, she is right. Lately I was thinking of my former friend and all the times we shared together.

Yes, sometimes we remember the good times and smooth over the bad ones. Its like when a person is a crappie person all their lives but then they die and all of a sudden they are saints. Wtf? Two days ago you were calling them a Sob and now they are wonderful? Get real just because they are dead doesn't erase all the bad they did.

I remember a classmate who made my life hell, he was forever calling me names, he was the first to start rumors about me, he tortured me on the bus. I had no idea what I ever did to him but he had it out for me. He was killed in a car crash junior year, everyone was going to his funeral, when they asked if I was going I said no.

They said it was disrespectful that I wasn't going. I said I wasn't a hypocrite I didn't like him when he was alive and just because he's dead doesn't change that fact.

Look I was sorry he died, he was young and had his whole life ahead of him but it didn't change the fact he was a ass.

So I get my cousin, my former friend was a ass to me, she hurt me and yes sometimes I forget all of that when I am remembering the past.

Yes, cuz....I am Tinker bell and I do see the good in people even the "toads"
I will never change, that's just me.

But I am far from stupid as I will never let her or anyone else who hurt me do it again. Their loss not mine... I am a friend for life, I love with all I am, I have your back, I am your do or die girl... but if you hurt me, we are done.

So today my friends and my dear cousin who I love so very much and who I know has my back without me ever looking.

Know this...I am not going to change, I will still pray for my enemies, I will still keep looking for the good in people, I will still forgive the ones who hurt me and I will still remember the good times and miss what we had even through the pain...that's just me...

Otherwise the memories of the pain will effect my life in a negative way and I've already went down that road so I will continue to  believe in fairy tales, I am going to forever be Tinker bell and not grow up...

"Be the change you want to see"
 
"And just when the caterpillar thought his life over...he turned into a beautiful butterfly"

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