What would you tell your younger self?

What would you tell your younger self?

Recently, while speaking to my therapist, he asked me what I would tell my younger self if I could.

I had to think about that for a moment as that is a deep question. As I thought about it, I realized that I would tell myself that what my grandmother did to me as a child was about her issues. She had mental health issues and that it had nothing to do with me.

No matter what I did to get her to love me, it would never fix her problem.

I would tell myself as I got older and picked the same type of man that subconsciously reminded me of her, that it is not my job to try to make someone happy. Some people will never be happy because they are not happy with themselves. I would say that I am worthy of love just the way I am. That I am enough without validation from others. The reason I kept picking the same kind of men after my divorce was because I was still carrying around the baggage from my childhood and my marriage, still feeling unworthy and running after someone's love.

I realized that so many of us carry around these childhood traumas, and even though we may have survived them, they are still deep inside of us. Sometimes, the things we keep doing are because of our pasts. My favorite saying from Maya Angelo is that when you know better, you do better. We also have to be honest with ourselves so that we can finally heal our past wounds and move on to become better people.

So today, my friends, remember it's okay to make mistakes when we are young. It's okay to see things from one perspective when we don't have a reference point. The idea of growing older is that we learn and that we change, hopefully. So give your younger self a break, look back on all you've learned since then, and give yourself some credit for as far as you've come. Then ask yourself, what would you tell your younger self now?

"Be the change you want to see," 

@TreadmillTreats 

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