Nothing changes when nothing changes

Nothing changes when nothing changes

One of my best friends use to say this all the time and she is right, nothing changes when nothing changes.
You have to want to make a change in your life for something to happen, its not just going to happen on it's own. If you read my blog you know that I'm a big believer in that anybody can change, if you truly want to. You can change anything about your life, anything about who you are.

This must come from you, you can't do it because someone else wants this for you or that someone else can do this for you. You also can't want to do this for somebody else, to please someone else, because eventually you're not pleasing yourself and you'll go back to the way you were, this must be about you and for you.

Saying all of this, there are some people who will never change, that's just who they are, that's just who they choose to be. Take my grandmother for instance, she was a mean, bitter and negative woman all of her life. I can't remember when she wasn't like this. This is who she was, she hated men, she never had a nice word to say, she always criticized everything.

As a little child when I would do something wrong she wouldn't talk to me for days, for weeks sometimes, it was horrible. Now she could have change if she wanted to, I absolutely believe that, yet she chose to be this person every single day. Watching her I chose to be the opposite, I chose to be the most positive person you will ever meet.

I remember writing about my cousin who was mean spirited and petty as a child and as an adult she is no different. Could she had grown up to be a different person? Absolutely but she didn't, as an adult she is still the same jealous, bitter and mean spirited person.

I have a friend who says he wants to change, he's sick of his girlfriend treating him like crap, sick of drinking every night, sick of who he is and how he treats others yet he is still there, still drinking, still acting like he's a teenager. My ex boyfriend, who I love dearly,  has been telling me the same story for years, he's moving, he's going to become rich, how he's building this house, yet all these years later, he has done none of these things nor made any effort to try to achieve these goals.

A great bible verse is "Faith without works is dead" Meaning if you have faith but do nothing about it, it's not happening! That's like saying you want a man yet you don't go out, your not online, your not putting any effort into finding one but you have faith.... what that Prince Charming will knock on your door, on one knee with flowers and chocolates? Get real!

Yes, you need to put forth effort, go to an AA meeting, start looking for that land, start saving, decide your not going to be mean, read self help books, go to consulting, leave your verbally abusive girlfriend, don't talk about it, do it!

I have many friends that have changed, one of my friends started a new career at 45, went back to school, got her degree in what she always wanted to do. Another friend stopped doing drugs and partying, she turned her whole life around, she now eats rights, exercises and is a huge role model for others in the same situation, giving back to help.

I had a friend that was 350 pounds, couldn't walk, on all kinds of pills, doctors told him he was going to die. He decided to change, he is now a coach, he looks terrific and is helping others do the same.

I was miserable and unhappy, I didn't like my self or my life, I changed my career, my attitude, I left a extremely wealthy marriage with nothing, I ran a triathlon and I couldn't swim! Really you can't change? Go petal that somewhere else, I am a true believer in anyone can change, you just really have to want it.

Will there be set backs? Will you repeat mistakes? Absolutely! Nothing is easy and I am not here to lie to you, I am not Willy Wonker,
I am not going to sugar coat it! But nothing is as gratifying as when you accomplish what you set out to do.

So today my friends remember, you can change today, you can do anything you set your mind to or you can do nothing...because nothing changes when nothing changes.

"Be the change you want to see"
 
"And just when the caterpillar thought his life over...he turned into a beautiful butterfly"

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