I Love My Home, I Love My Life

I Love My Home, I Love My Life

There is not a day that I don't walk in my front door that I don't say these words,

"I love my house, I love my life."

Yes, every single time, and believe me, it never gets old. This is the feeling, time after time. I've been here 12 years and I still feel peace as soon as I walk in here. Recently my daughter and I were talking about it. How peaceful our home is and how we love it. 

We both learned that we would never allow anyone to come in and take away that peace.

For me, it's so important because I can still remember all the years I cried myself to sleep while I was married. Back then I would close my eyes and dream about what my home would look like and feel like.

I would go through each room in my mind. I would picture the feel of the house, the furniture, even the paintings on the walls. Yes, I was that vivid in my imagination. 

Even when I didn't have the strength yet to leave my situation, I would buy things and hide them away. I would say "This is for my new home, a home where I would be happy and at peace" Sometimes when things got really bad I would sneak and pull out something from my future and hold it. I would close my eyes and picture myself there in my new home, at peace and for that moment I would be okay.

It became my escape, when he would scream at me that I was worthless, I would go to "my home" and see how it was going to be. He would be yelling and I would be gone, off to my new house and my new life. It was literally how I got through the last two years there. 

I also made vision boards.

I cut out furniture, lamps, and tables. I cut out places I wanted to go, and quotes I wanted to be, like strong, independent, and free. I put it up in my laundry room so I could see it every day and know that this was going to be my future.

When I finally got the courage to leave and found this townhome, I knew I was home, this was the place I've dreamt about. The first night there, surrounded by boxes, exhausted from the move I sat on the floor and looked around and cried. I was finally free, here I was on my own, free at last! 

For so many years I dreamt of this and here I was, and it was overwhelming. 

I unpacked, and then every weekend I went to yard sales and consignment shops. Little by little I got it done and it came out exactly as I had envisioned it. It is light and airy with a beachy feel. It is warm and inviting and I love it more and more each day even 12 years later. And again this weekend as I am throwing a graduation party for my daughter, we will be surrounded by friends and family in my beautiful home. I am crying again because I am so grateful for this home and this life.

So why I am telling you this? It's because you might be in that dark space right now. You don't think you can do this on your own, maybe he has told you, you are worthless, or can never make it on your own. So you feel stuck.

So today my friends, I am here to tell you to keep dreaming. Make yourself a vision board, buy small things you want to start your new home with, and then dream, dream, dream.

Never stop believing!

You can do it, you will do it! And one day you will write to me and say "I love my home" just as I do each and every day. I believe in you, you can be the change you want to see.

@TreadmillTreatsCheck out my daily blogs @ https://treadmilltreats.blogspot.com/?m=1

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