Why Do I Write About My Past?

Why Do I Write About My Past? 

So recently my girls said why do I write about my past, that I have issues letting go. Recently it has been 14 years since my freedom and yes I've been writing about it. Why? Because each and every day I give thanks that I am free. 

This was my response to them. I have forgiven their father for all that he did to me. Was it easy? No. Did it come fast? Oh hell no. But I learned to own what I did in our marriage and forgive him for what he did. I have moved on in my heart and in my life. I don't hate him, and I don't wish him bad. I know that Karma is real and you get what you give, because that is true for all of us. 

The reason I do this, this blog, or my speaking engagements is because I know there are people out there that are in the same situation that I was. Someone who feels helpless, who doesn't see any light at the end of the tunnel. Maybe even someone like me, who hit rock bottom and wanted to end it all. I want them to know to hang on, to trust that things will get better. To know that if you stop being afraid that things can and will change. 

I am not trying to be vindictive, this is not about me hurting him. If people want others to talk good about them, they should have done better! 

This is my truth that I am allowed to speak. 

This is my truth that I need to speak it in order to help others. This is about me telling my testimony to help others. I need to be a light for others who are where I was so that they know there is hope. To learn how to love yourself again, to have faith, to know that you are not stuck forever, miserable. 

So today my friends, I am here to tell you that this is my purpose and I am certainly not going to keep my mouth shut to make others “look” or feel better. 

I am sorry, not sorry. This is for you out there who follow me, who feel hopeless, who cry every night, and who are stuck in fear. This is for you. 

Know that you are not alone, know that I am here for you, know that anything is possible and I am living proof. So this is why I speak about my past, to help others with their future. Because only you can be the change you want to see.

@TreadmillTreats

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