Trusting God's timing

Trusting God's timing 

 I know that recently I have been a little down, I've been a little depressed because I feel like I'm not living my purpose. I know that I am writing every day and I am out there trying to promote my purpose but I'm not working at this full time, this is not my full time job. I also know that we all live in a fast world, we have fast food, fast technology, and fast answers. We want everything fast, I'm no different from everybody else, I want it fast as well.

I am a Christian and I know that it's on God's time and not mine and that I must just hold on and have faith. I also know that faith without work is dead and so I've been working at this purpose,especially for the last 3 years when I realize that this is what I want to do with my life.

Even though I am Christian I am human and I get discouraged especially when I'm plugging away day after day and nothing is happening. When I prayed, fasted, and tithe, and still nothing and I get  frustrated. Look, I tell it like it, like it is in this blog and I have to be real here...sometimes I cry out "When God when?"

But I also remember for years while in my horrible abusive marriage that I cried to him asking him that very question. I begged him when I was going through my divorce, yet still living in my toxic home with my soon to be ex to hurry up.

I prayed day and night for a home for me and my girls, for years, yet I've come to realize that all of this was on his time not mine. It took 3 years before I had the courage to leave, 2 years before the divorce was over and a year after when God not only answered my prayers but exceeded them. I prayed for a rental home for me and my girls but he gave me a forever home, 40,000 less than going value because I was faithful, because I never gave up praying and believing that he would but again it was all on his time and not mine.

I would envision my life, my new home. I had a vision board with how I wanted to feel, what it looked like and it all came to pass and more. He gave me more than I could have imagined but was it easy? Oh hell no, there were many times I cried out this to him, there were many days I didn't think I could go on but I held on to that tiny mustard seed of faith. Some days I couldn't find anything to be grateful about so I made myself find one thing, my girls, a roof over my head, food in the refrigerator, basic things because that's all I had. That turned into bigger things, more things until I was grateful for everything even the bad things as they taught me how truly strong I was if I believed in him.

And today my friends I tell you all of this because there may be someone out there who may be feeling like I am now or how desperate I was years ago and you may be crying out to God like I am.

My message is this,.hold on, trust in God, it's coming, he will be there, on his time, not yours. Just trust God's timing.

I will leave you with this, as I was writing this on the treadmill this morning, one of my favorite songs came on and it so connects with my soul because you never know what someone else is going through, you don't know what it cost them, so let's be kind to one another as some people are battling wars you know nothing about.

 I love this song because we don't know what anyone's been through,  how hard it's been but this explains how I feel….

"She felt such pain, some spoke to her in anger….there's no place for her kind….

You weren't there the night he found me, you didn't feel what it felt when he wrapped his loving arms around me, you don't know the cost of the oil, you don't know my praise, you don't know the cost of the oil in my alabaster box.

I can't forget the way life used to be until the day when Jesus came to me and healed my soul with the wonder of his touch so now I'm giving back to him all the praise he's worthy of"

"Be the change you want to see"

 

"And just when the caterpillar thought his life over...he turned into a beautiful butterfly"

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