When your pettiness outweighs your love for your child

When your pettiness outweighs your love for your child

I am saddened, truly saddened that my ex is doing this. Don't get me wrong I know he loves his children but his hatred for me outweighs it.

My little one was in the hospital this weekend, as soon as I found out I went to the hospital to be with her. When I got there I asked where her father was, she said he left because he didnt want to be with me.
Your child is in the hospital, yet you can't put your pettiness away for your child? You can't be there and not let your anger and hatred effect your child?

This was the first time she was ever in a hospital, I knew she was scared and I wasn't going to do anything to upset her more than she already was. See this is what you do for your children you put away your own shit to make sure they are okay, to make them comfortable. I worked around her dad's pettiness to be there for her as I did not want her to feel she had to pick between us.

But seriously... seriously.... how petty are you? I am the mother of your children, we were married 24 years, I did not cheat on you with your best friend. (Which by the way your brother's girl did and he still talks to her??)
I did not steal all your money, I was a good wife and mother for all those years but all I wanted is to be free and be happy and for this you hate me?

You speak bad about me to your girls, how do you think that makes them feel that you do that? I am their mother...
You say you will never speak to me or be in the same room with me. You go through them with messages for me...
You put them in the middle of our mess as if this all wasn't bad enough?

So what will happen when they graduate from college, get married, or have children? Do you expect them to pick?
Are you not going to be there because I sure the hell will.
Are you going to hold on to your anger and bitterness for 40 years like your mother has? Letting it eat you up inside? Like a cancer, where it's all you speak of?

It you were a real man you would do the same thing a friend of ours has. Even after his wife of 20 years cheated on him and then left him and married the man she cheated on. He still came to family functions, he showed her and her new husband respect for the sake of his children. That is what a real man does, that is what parents do who want to put the best interests of their children above themselves.

My father cheated on my mom yet they overcame it to be best friends to raise me. They put me first as it should be.

Look I was not perfect in our marriage, I have owned my own shit but I sure as hell don't deserve this. And if I can forgive you for all the verbal abuse you gave me for 24 years, you sure as hell can forgive me and move the hell on.

I will do anything for our girls, I want them to know their parents love them enough to overcome anything to put them first.
But I can not do this alone, they need both of their parents.They need both parents to be grown ass adults and get over their crap.

You know how this was growing up... your father talking bad about your mother and your mother did the same...how did that feel? I know, like shit because you use to say it all the time and yet you are repeating the same steps.

Look do whatever you want to, you have moved on, you have another relationship, but look at what your actions are doing to your children. I will continue to be the bigger person, I will not talk about you to our children, I will be at functions with you and be cordial to you and your family, I will put my children first and foremost.

I pray for the sake of our children that you will do the same. Because if you truly love them, you will put them and their feelings first.
You will not let your pettiness outweigh your love for your children.

"Be the change you want to see"
 
"And just when the caterpillar thought his life over...he turned into a beautiful butterfly"

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